When Death Gives Way to Life

The other day I had a momentary vision.  I saw myself curling up into a ball, and sinking down into feet of rich soil. And I heard these words in my heart, “unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies…”

Of course the rest of John 12:24 goes: ” it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds.”

I feel like I have been going through that dying process for a little while now.

  • my desire for comfort
  • my desire for recognition
  • my alignment to anything except the good news of Jesus
  • my right to be right
  • my attempts to change others
  • my need to be needed
  • my right to my own schedule
  • my right to keep my problems to myself

I’m letting it all be slayed by something greater.

Not that I have fully reached any of this.  It is a slow process, but I am in it and I like it.


My hope is that my old ways will be replaced by a selflessness that shines like a lamp on a stand, and with a love that puts others first, a love that dares to step out with faithful action.

Today I had another momentary vision. I again saw myself as a seed of sorts. And I was churning inside. Growing. And suddenly the seed shell burst open and out shot a living shoot, bright and green.

God and I have been hanging out, and he’s been churning things inside this life of mine, good things, hard things . . . and I feel so much energy building up – enough energy perhaps to branch out of this casing and become a full-grown plant that produces seeds by the dozens.


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